bibliomancy for the new moon (solar) eclipse in aquarius...

"...the vision of soul given by anima is more than just one more perspective. The call of soul convinces; it is a seduction into psychological faith, a faith in images and the thought of the heart, into an animation of the world. Anima attaches and involves. She makes us fall into love. We cannot remain the detached observer looking through a lens. In fact, she probably doesn't partake in optical metaphors at all. Instead, she is continually weaving, stewing, and enchanting consciousness into passionate attachments away from the vantage point of a perspective..."

(James Hillman, Anima)

and for a new moon in sagittarius (that almost slipped my mind)

"Attention to the qualities of things resurrects the old idea of notitia as a primary activity of the soul. Notitia refers to that capacity to form true notions of things from attentive noticing. It is the noticing on which knowledge depends..."

(James Hillman, Anima Mundi)

bibliomancy for a new moon in scorpio...

Many time man lives and dies
Between his two eternities,
That of race and that of soul,
And ancient Ireland knew it all.
Whether man die in his bed
Or the rifle knocks him dead,
A brief parting from those dear
Is the worst man has to fear.
Though grave-diggers' toil is long,
Sharp their spades their muscles strong.
They but thrust their buried men
Back in the human mind again.

WB YEATS

and for a new moon in libra...

"The existentialist emphasis on commitment which many psycho-analysts credit with broadening the scope and shifting the emphasis of their work suffers many of the same defects, thought they are expressed differently. For both Sartre and the early Heidegger (Being and Time), the unbridgeable distance between self and others gives interpersonal commitment an arbitrary and self-centered quality. I am committed because I choose to be, not because the other, who is just a mirror that narcissisticly reflects my existence back to me, in any way solicits that commitment. It is I, my choosing, which lends meaning and value to the commitment and I who benefits by thus exercising my freedom...Equally, commitment understood in quantum terms...is not something directed towards others, nor projected upon others, but and act of fidelity bound up with others as a fundamental part of the self's own definition, a fundamental part of its very nature as a system always engaged in creative relationship..."

(Danah Zohar, The Quantum Self)

bibliomancy for a new moon in cancer

inner trinity d sinclair 'o8

"The Orphan archetype teaches the inner child to survive difficulty. The Wanderer differentiates the adolescent from parents and others and promotes the sense of adventure we need to face the unknown. The Warrior activates the inner father so he can protect and provide for us. The Altruist supports the inner mother so she can nurture and comfort us."

- Carol S Pearson: The Hero Within, Six Archetypes We Live By, p 220

a new moon and a conjunction of the sun, venus and mercury in gemini

'but something inside me says it's gonna be fine'
d sinclair '08

(no bibliomancy today, the current cosmic conditions will reveal all, without any help from me)

I was going to write about how the week's activities have shown me how strong I am, about how I've overcome many of my doubts, as a writer, as a woman and mother and as a person. I actually did write a long essay on how great it is to be finally writing my book, about being busy getting my home ready to be sold and getting the car fixed and finally cutting ties with the father of my child. I wrote that through it all I've been fine, I've been stoic and resolute and positive. That I've maintained my composure and calm and kept the faith.

It was all lies, so I deleted it.

The truth is that I'm not at all positive about the house being sold - the children and I believed this was our permanent home, that we'd make it our own. Today when the 'stylist' came to the house and told me that it needed 'such a lift' I felt as saggy and disappointed as I ever have. Apparently I have to change so much about the way it is I might as well just move out and let the experts come in and do the 'make over'. After she left I stood in the kitchen and cried.

It was like letting one of my ex husband's friends in to the house - he's an architect and the sort of people he prefers the company of are likely to critique everything they see. In an objective, arty and intellectual way, of course. Nothing personal. (believe me I just didn't need to be reminded of my ex husband, his friends or the house I left behind to gain this supposed freedom)

I know its silly to get upset, that it's just a service offered by the real estate agent in the interests of getting a better price on the house, and it really isn't personal. Its only personal to me.

A house is an extension of soul, in a way - which is how feng shui can have such an effect - it has an energy which is intimately connected with the energy of its inhabitants. We get a 'feel' for homes and they have 'vibes'. This house has been loved and cared for like everything else in my life - and its beautiful - so to have a stranger come in and tell me how much more work there is to do on it is a blow.

A lesson learned, I guess. Not to be too attached, not to get invested in an egoic idea of home and soul and the care of it.

The same goes for the rest of what's been going on around here. While on one level I've found I can rely on inner resources, there's a current of anger and fear and loneliness which has some power over me still. My chest hurts like a handful of me has been pulled out so I know I'm grieving.

I tend to try and distract myself and to deny what I'm feeling. I tell myself that my inner peace can't be destroyed by outer events, by other's words, or lack thereof or by anything short of an act of god. I want that to be true. On the other hand, I'm so darn tired of having to be brave and strong and manage all of it on my own, I can understand why people turn to religion. There are days when I just want to hand my whole life over to a higher power and relinquish all responsibility for it.

But there's still hope in the here and now, and I'm going to continue to work together with that higher power, taking responsibility for my Self, myself. I'll work with my heart to heal what's hurting, and with my soul to have a home, where ever that may be next. I still have choices.

Choices are worth a lot.

bibliomancy for a new moon in taurus

"liar lyre pants on fire" d sinclair all rights reserved 08

"..where do I wander? Down what draughty tunnels? Where the eyeless wind blows? And there grows nothing for the eye. No rose. To issue where? In some harvestless dim field where no evening lets fall her mantle; nor sun rises. All's equal there. Unblowing, ungrowing are the roses there."

(Virginia Woolf, Between the Acts, 1941)