bibliomancy for the new moon (solar) eclipse in aquarius...

"...the vision of soul given by anima is more than just one more perspective. The call of soul convinces; it is a seduction into psychological faith, a faith in images and the thought of the heart, into an animation of the world. Anima attaches and involves. She makes us fall into love. We cannot remain the detached observer looking through a lens. In fact, she probably doesn't partake in optical metaphors at all. Instead, she is continually weaving, stewing, and enchanting consciousness into passionate attachments away from the vantage point of a perspective..."

(James Hillman, Anima)

the language of the birds...

you look more like a magpie these days '07

Writers write every day. Artists create all the time. That's what I'm told - a real writer is compelled toward setting words in print, come foul or fair. In worst of times, the true writer will come up with just one word rather than fail to create.
Julia Cameron, author of The Artist's Way , insists that many self proclaimed 'writers' are in love with the idea of being a writer but when it comes down to it are without the drive or the stamina to do the work. Others possess talent but internal voices of critics past and present snuff out any sparks of motivation or inspiration. There's also a category of women, in Cameron's Way, who produce baby after baby rather than show up at the page and answer an artistic call. Fruit of the womb as a substitute for real world success is the gist of that bit of pop-psychology.

You can imagine that someone such as myself, who has indeed produced baby after baby and not much else (by some standards), who may well be one of those who are in love with the poetic image of the solitary but brilliant artist and who could just as well qualify for the other, would be suitably shamed and chastised by all of it and duly set a course of remedial action.

Actually, no.

There comes a moment in a person's life, hopefully for all of us, when the realisation dawns that enough means enough, that yes there are difficulties, possibly some cellulite (I jest!) or a lack of funds, but these needn't be a reason not to accept oneself and one's life completely as is. Exactly as is. Not the potential of oneself, not the idea of how one could be, and not the way one would be if all the problems were overcome. Yes, just like this.

There also comes a moment of reckoning (and I'm having one of these) - a kind of straighten-up-and-fly-right type message from the divine. It hasn't escaped me that after over a year of drawing birds and working with words I've moved into a house where the previous occupant went to great measures to repel all things feathered. The now fully laden fruit trees in the back garden are enclosed in a gigantic metal cage - which at first glance looks like an aviary but is designed to keep birds out. Every now and then a cheeky little bowerbird will squeeze under the gate and help himself to some windfalls while I watch with admiration - with that much determination the little guy is welcome to anything he can get. Even with the limits set in a most obvious way, life thrives.

Work with what you've got, the signs all say, no remedial action required other than what it takes to move from stone-still to action - openness (and maybe a small measure of that little bird's cheekiness).

So what if one isn't built for creating epics - one can always come up with an haiku or two. If there's only a small gap in a busy day (perhaps otherwise filled with nappy changing, runs to school and the market and the like) there's still opportunity enough to look around and notice things - to see life in one's own way - get under the fence and be inspired.

And if all else fails, take a look at what has been created so far.

In honour of Mercury's retrograde phase, I'm doing a review of my work - including some of my favourite bird drawings.

there goes my angel... ds '08

waiting for moonrise ds '08


unfinished business ds '08

balsamic sparrow ds '08



heron now ds '08

and for the coming solar eclipse...

'swallow and don't stop' d sinclair '08

"To paraphrase an old saw, the wound becomes the window to the soul. Without the affects, our unconsciousness would continue and we would be deprived of the opportunity to grow, to live more fully, more authentically, more responsibility.

For this reason, shame and dread, although experienced as painful psychological chaos, are, if worked through, opportunities to establish order by integrating into consciousness elements of our lives which were both unconscious and critically important...."

(Sandra Edelman; Turning the Gorgon, a Meditation on Shame)

bibliomancy for venus in aquarius

"The Cloudless Sky.

The sun is shining on you,
bright and clear
in a cloudless sky.
Everything is going as you wish."

(100 Poems of the Goddess, The Kuan Yin Oracle)

Well, this is more optimistic than I thought possible. I almost overlooked this transit on account of all the Saturn activity - teeth and bone and joint issues abound in my family and among friends, not to mention a general heaviness in myself.

Alright then, Saturn rules Aquarius, so it fits.

I've been contemplating what it means to 'build community' (one of Aquarius' rulerships) and the wider world. There's a strong pull towards whatever is 'out there' as opposed to hiding away here at home behind my computer screen.

As mentioned casually to a friend - and not for the first time lately - 'I've been living under a rock for far too long'.

Its a big rock and quite a burden, not to mention the kind of insect-life one attracts from under here. And having dropped my sense of humour somewhere in the dirty darkness I seem incapable of 'lightening up'.

Darn. I've heard of the 'wrong side of the tracks' but it looks like I'm on the wrong side of the rock.

I want to be on top.

So I ask you, what does it take? You're all 'out there' - am I missing anything? Is this idea of 'community' one of those ideas, like marriage and formal education that are theoretically sound but in general practice rather, er unsound? Is it a fantasy?

Oh, don't get me wrong - I'm not saying that marriage and education are fantasies, only that our stories around them can be detrimental to our mental health. (ok, MY mental health, I'm sure yours is fine)

So is 'community' another monotheistic model for lived experience that will bring me to grief - or am I looking for reasons to keep hauling like Atlas indefinitely?

There is an argument, quite a scientific one if you view Quantum Mechanics as science - that separation is an illusion. So we aren't individuals, however much our egos tell us we bloodywellare, and creating groups of individuals seems to me like creating kind of a communal ego. More separation, more fear and more trouble.

As a child it bothered me somewhat that there are such things as countries and nations and borders. We all live here on this one world together - part of it - we're all the same aren't we? I'd think to myself (yes I knew better than to say it outloud) that there was a Big Mistake.

My mother should have put me to bed instead of in the bouncy chair in front of the telly that day they walked on the moon - the day they showed us we're a living ball hanging in space.

Hm. Where was I going with this?

I'm really getting to the point of no return - separation is an illusion, as is the darn rock I keep referring to (but not the one we live on and are in fact a part of). There isn't anything 'out there' that isn't going on 'in here'.

All at once, actually, inside and out, in the large and little things that happen each day, each moment.

Time and space as we know them are changing - our linear model won't fit with our expanding world view and concurrent shrinking technology. We're learning to see beyond what we think is happening to what the other possibilites are.

Its too easy as people locked into our daily routines to fall deep into the Saturnine trap of 'not enough', that is, disconnection and immobilisation by the fear of scarcity, of inadequacy and failure. Turning away from another true state of things.

Sure, such a thing as scarcity does exist - limits exist, boundaries, form, borders and egos exist for real reasons - but the other truth is that we are limitless, we are all made of the same stuff and that the biggest thing and the smallest thing are exactly the same.

Its not one or the other, its both.

So there's no need for me to go anywhere to commune - if you are somewhere dancing, so am I. If you are somewhere making love, so are we all. I can sit right here at my desk, and lifetimes of experience and understanding are delivered to me instantly.

Of course, should I venture past my front door, unlock the gate, take myself out and actually have some fun I can only be doing the world some good - right?

That's no light-weight idea.